Ankle-baring slim pants are so great.  Was browsing the internet the other day, though, and saw Gwyneth Paltrow in cropped trousers on Chelsea Handler.  Apparently not everyone loves the look, and one commenter said “Capris are the last resort of the 40-something who knows her legs are beginning to go”.  Not true, says I.  There’s something very fresh and young but also timeless about them – and you know we love classic things on VainLane (it’s why we love vintage!).

I say great job.  Plus those moccasins look really comfortable, and now I want them.

• Cropped pants and Gwyneth dis (language is NSFW)
• Tod’s has excellent (but pricey) driving moccasins – also great for walking, or just wearing

Wearing a monochromatic outfit can be hard to pull off.  To once again reference 30 Rock (I’ll stop soon, I promise), when Liz Lemon tried to wear a tan turtleneck and khakis, she, according to her boss Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin), looked like a human condom.

To me, this Disney prince’s look works – no human condom in sight.  Unfortunately this shot doesn’t do justice to the outfit, which could accurately be described as “variations on a theme: beige”, but the blend of textures, patterns and varying tones of tan make this a sophisticated little get-up for a lazy Sunday afternoon.  Also, his socks are lime green.  Eeee!  SO cute.  I wish you guys could see them!  Use your imaginations?

The look:

• Korean infinity scarf from Fusion (Changle Lu)
• Navy striped sweater from Sixpack France (purchased in Hong Kong)
• Fine plaid blazer from Jos. A. Bank (stolen from brother)
• Beige corduroy trousers from Muji
• Shoes from Initial (in Hong Kong)
• Messenger bag from Suitcase London

Sometimes it can be really hard to say goodbye.  I know from sad, heartbreaking experience.  When the butt on my favorite Levis wore out and I had to turn them into the sluttiest Daisy Dukes this side of Daisy Mae Clampett, it turned out that I couldn’t wear them in public because, in fact, they were too slutty.

When the inner thighs of my favorite Diesels wore out I asked a tailor to please do anything in her power to repair the damage.  She went over them so many times with needle, thread and pusher foot that my thighs were, much to my chagrin, no longer able to reside in said jeans.

So I know how it feels.  Believe me.  But this?  Well.  I have a word.

This, to quote a favorite red-headed bombastic secretary from a certain slick show, is EGREGIOUS.  When the three-headed dog that guards the gates of Hades tears a hole in the butt of your trousers, you throw them out.  You do not try to negotiate the hole by wearing men’s underwear (which, for the record, I kind of like, but in the privacy of your own home, please).  Indeed, those self-same underwear that are protecting your tuckus from exposure are giving you the dreaded: muffin top.  Now, this is something that that can happen to even skinny folk.  But more importantly, it is also something that can also be completely avoided.  By purchasing – and wearing – clothes that a) fit and b) are whole.  It’s science.

P.S.  Has your mom ever pretended to pose with an umbrella so that it doesn’t look like you’re trying to take a picture of someone at a flea market with a giant hole in their pants?  You should try it.

P.P.S. Why are two famous dumb country girls from fictional TV shows both named Daisy?  Maybe we should grant someone a Fulbright Scholarship to study that.

On one of the last warm fall days in Shanghai, we came across this beaut. Anne Disch is in transit by way of Amsterdam — temporarily residing in Shanghai for 4 months — and thankfully she brought her style with her.  Her body hanger displays dominating chandelier earrings, strappy metallic ankle boots, and an oversized LA style shirt that is great for throwing a cardigan or leather jacket over, depending on who you’re trying to impress.  The tailored harlem pants, aka dropped crotch pants, originated from Philip Lim 3.1, Balenciaga and/or Stella McCartney, and are a comfy choice on a lazy sunday afternoon.

• earrings: H&M
• shirt: Zara
• strapless top from Wolford
• pants by Mage Paris
• Zara shoes
• knock-off Marc Jacobs from the People’s Square market